I Wondered, Lonely As A Cloud.

What are we going to do in the
crude light of the daytime?
When we no longer have darkness to shroud ourselves in and blame for depressive thoughts? When I was in bed, you know how it is, your mind just goes wild, haha, I can’t believe what was I even thinking of?
What do we do when we can’t blame it on the elements? when the weather just got me down, did you see the clouds, I hate the rain? when looking at the limited edition sculptures from my childhood is too much? when I was just so hot, it was making me uncomfortable, you know how it is when you get so hot you can’t think straight? when I was just being silly, oh stop it, ignore me honestly I’m absolutely fine, I don’t know what came over me, gosh how embarrassing?
What do we do when we can’t blame nature? when oh sorry wrong time of the month, ignore me, you know how it is, you must have had it yourself, gosh when it comes I don’t know what comes over me, don’t mean to be crude, maybe I should get some pills, oh no, stop it, haha?
What is there left to blame when we take these away? Who else makes us think dark things? What possible element of the world, Of life, could it possibly be? Who else, What else, are you going to blame? Well maybe we should own up to it? well was it really me thinking, I don’t think it now, it was just my kvetch, I’m really quite happy now, do I still need to worry because I’m sure I’m fine now? why was I sad, does it really matter seeing as I’m not bothered any more, look I’m smiling, just a mere lapse in my optimism, everyone has them, don’t you think?
Do you think maybe that sometimes negative thoughts just exist? do you think that maybe people force them away for so long that when it’s too windy, when it’s too cold, when it’s too hot, when it’s wet, when it’s dark, when I’m bored, when it’s that time again, that I have to indulge myself in this pit of darkness otherwise the world will end, I’ll die, I have to be sad now, I know I do, it’s that time, it’s too dark, too bright, I have a headache, it’s too harsh, too opaque, please I ache, make it break, make it stop, I don’t care, let it drop, I have to be sad, I have to be sad, I have to be sad.
Why do I have to be sad?
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